Anyway, I should be writing my papers right now but I just wanted to rant about how inadequate I feel for my second rotation. I know I should be able to handle my patient's better given that I already have a background in pediatric practice from my first rotation. But no! The UP-PGH DRM OT Pediatric Section is a whole other ball game.
The most taxing part about this rotation is the case load. I went from having 8 clients per week to about 27! That's a pretty huge leap. Honestly, I can barely even remember the faces of the kids I treat and those that I do remember, well, I'd rather not remember them at all. I don't know why but it's always the most difficult kids that make an impact on me. In the spirit of honesty, I won't lie by saying that sometimes I wish they'd rather not come in at all. Getting them to calm down every single time they throw a tantrum or getting my hair pulled right from my head gets old REALLY quickly. I'd rather not go through the whole ordeal if I had any say about it.
I feel bad almost as soon as that thought passes through my mind. I realized that our profession is not about those who are already high-functioning. These children with the most difficult behaviors, who can barely engage in their everyday occupations... these children are the ones in most need of our services. Who am I to begrudge them of the opportunity to become more functional members of society? It was an eye-opening realization for me. The fact that these parents bring their children miles away from home just to be able to avail of the P50.00 therapy sessions further adds to my shame. I realized that a few sleepless nights are a small price to pay for the chance to make an impact in the lives of these families.
Tomorrow, as I go to the clinic and end my second week at PGH-Pedia, I go in with a new perspective, a perspective that zeroes in on service above self... a value constantly being imprinted upon me as an Iskolar ng Bayan.